Every Friday morning since I was invited to write my Single Ladies Friday blog on Little Holiday I sit at my computer thinking “what am I going to write about today?” The night before I write, I may call a friend to see what’s poppin’ on the dating scene. At times, I am inspired by current tabloid events. Most often, I try to think back on when I was dating. Last night, however, my blog post idea came from an unlikely source: the NBC 11:00 pm newscast. The teaser- Why are so many NYC women single? I stayed tuned to watch. I truly thought NBC was going to break a profound theory…but it was all of same stuff … “more successful women than men,” “too many gay guys,” “married men”…blah, blah, blah. We’ve heard all of these theories before. These facts have not changed and will not change in the near future – so now what? Here is my theory: women are not strategically dating! If life is like a game of chess, in dating women must calculate every move. Single Ladies, you’re first move in the dating game is to CHECK WHO YOU’RE ROLLING WITH!
In college I had a boyfriend. I didn’t really hit the dating scene until grad school. And my grad school was conveniently located in the heart of NYC. For 3 years I went to class all day and partied hard at least 3 nights a week. I was truly living my own “Sex in the City” life. And I rolled with my “Sex in the City” girls. There was a Miranda, a Samantha, a Charlotte and a Carrie. We all had it going on but we were all so different- personality wise, as well as in our looks. Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t strategically choose my friends; we shared many commonalities and had great fun times together. But there could never be a question in a guy’s mind on who to “choose” when approaching the four of us. He had to either want a Miranda, a Samantha, a Charlotte or a Carrie.
So many ladies make the mistake of going out on the single’s scene with their “look-alike” girlfriends. We all have those – girlfriends who wear the same dress style, have similar haircuts and like the same type of guy. The biggest problem with hanging with these girls is that invariably there is one HOT chick that stands out in the “look-alike” group. You know- she’s the one with the perfect boobs-to-hip-to-ass-ratio, the one with great hair and the one who can eat anything and not even look at a treadmill. She may be your best friend- but you need to leave her at home. Save her for a Tyler Perry movie. It’s time to think strategically about your “on the scene girlfriends” because that chick will always get the guy. Re-evaluate your social friends and either choose to be that chick or start rolling with your “non-look-alike” friends. When choosing your “on the dating scene” girlfriends think “Sex in the City” rather than “Destiny’s Child”- cause Beyonce will 92% of the time get the man.
I hope I did not rev up any controversy with this one. But I am also hoping that on this SINGLE LADIES FRIDAY, I gave my single lady friends a new theory to consider. Stop bringing your competition to the game and CHECK WHO YOU’RE ROLLING WITH!

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