This week my DVR was 100% full.  Last night I cleared up some of the backlog by watching back-to-back episodes of Oprah.  I watched: “Man Makeovers”, “No Phone Zone”, and then there was Rielle Hunter– the Other Woman (John Edwards’ side piece).  I couldn’t believe the things that she was saying.  I considered pressing the delete button when she said “it’s not my experience that a third party wrecks a home” – was this chick for real?  I took my finger off the delete button and removed my mind from a place of judgment.

Rielle Hunter is not the first woman to have a relationship with a married and we all know that she will not be the last.  If it is at all possible to give advice to a woman who is considering having a relationship with a married man or an otherwise engaged man – I will not be the one to give it.  I can, however, share with you advice on how to spot a married man (who thinks it is okay to start dating) and avoid being The Other Woman.

Spotting a married man Tip # 1 – He does not share his home phone number.  Rielle Hunter expressed to Oprah that she brought “Johnny” a cell phone to keep in touch with him – some nerve!  I guess she knew that she could never have access to the home phone.  Rielle provides a great illustration of why tip # 1 holds true.  If the man that you are seeing does not give you his home telephone number in a situation where: 1) you are caught up in a deep conversation, 2) he is at home, and 3) his cell phone battery is fading- there is something wrong.  Assume that he is a  married man.  Move on and do not become The Other Woman.

Spotting a married man Tip # 2 – You have not met his family.  Some men actually have the balls to bring the other woman around and introduce her as a friend.  If you ever find yourself in that situation and his sister or girl cousin is giving you the evil eye – something is wrong, move on and assume that he is a married man.  Do not become The Other Woman.

Spotting a married man Tip # 3 – He did not post a picture with the online profile.  Something is wrong  – assume one of two things: he is a married man or he’s ugly – either reason is cause to move on. 

Spotting a married man Tip # 4 – Your female senses are tingling.  He exhibits odd behavior, especially when you are out in public.   Your dates are timed events.   You never get to hang out on the weekends.  He cancels plans at the last minute and his sole means of communication is texting- – Gurrrl, your female senses should be flaring.  Your intuition is right and he is not!  Assume he is a married man and move on.

So there you have it.  On this Single Ladies Friday, I am urging you to heed the tips, do not become The Other Woman.  If it ain’t right, take flight! And, if he’s doing wrong, move on!

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